Funny quotes about single women

Most comedians pull jokes from a place of honesty. Therefore, if you write the code as cleverly as possible, you are, by definition, not smart enough to debug it. The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy. Baruch A stockbroker urged me to buy a stock that would triple its value every year.

Please get out of my Van Halen T-shirt before you jinx the band and they break up. We are not shipping your machine! Idiots don't use Ada. She changes it more often. Without ripping your clothes, love dove into your bosom; I will not slash your flesh to heal it.

Warren Buffett I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink. Love for my mother and dad If your mistress is sincere and faithful, love her for that; but if she is not, if she is merely young and beautiful, love her for that; if she is agreeable and spirituelle, love her for that; if she is none of these things but merely loves you, love her for that.

Funny Facebook Status Quotes

Rodney Dangerfield I have a love interest in every one of my films: Mencken "A man is incomplete until he is married. A legal or religious ceremony by which two persons of the opposite sex solemnly agree to harass and spy on each other for ninety-nine years, or until death do them join.

The next year, they came back and put the sidewalks where the trails were in the grass. Looking for similar funny jokes? Death isn't nature's greatest mistake — falling in love is. Phyllis Diller Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them.

I attribute all my success in life to the moral, intellectual and physical education I received from her. Now they have two problems. They already think that the writing of shell scripts is a natural act. Billy Connolly Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away.

Do you see the leaves falling from the trees, the sun rising and setting? A woman finds love and insists on turning it into happiness. If you do we will send evil dwarfs after you.

Funny Quotes & Sayings

Take one down, patch it around. Ellen DeGeneres Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime. Dykes Love is much like a wild rose, beautiful and calm, but willing to draw blood in its defense.

We've seen the victims' agonies and helped burn the corpses. John Lennon People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do. And no one can understand infatuation, no matter how many times he has experienced it. Albert Einstein If I want to knock a story off the front page, I just change my hairstyle.

Brooks, Love is a condition where the world seems to be standing still, and it's you who are spinning on your axis. Walt Disney There are only three things women need in life:Collection of aphorisms,famous film quotes and phrases.

Use the search box to filter the famous movies quotes,aphorism in the database. Among the phrases you will find famous quotes by Woody Allen, Albert Einstein quotes, Winston Churchill quotes and many other authors, philosophers and famous actors. The Funniest Movie Quotes (in the last 50 years -- in chronological order) "Gentlemen, you can't fight in here!

This is the War Room." Dr. Strangelove: Or, How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (). If you're looking for a funny facebook status or just facebook status quotes in general we've gathered a list of the very best!

Large collection of quotes for facebook status. So, Above was the our Collection of TOP Funny Whatsapp also included Funny Quotes & Funny Status for Whatsapp in this Article.

This Article also includes Funny Status for Whatsapp for Boys & Girls. You can also share these Funny Whatsapp Status with Friends & Family. Love is a symbol of eternity.


It wipes out all sense of time, destroying all memory of a beginning and all fear of an end. ~Author Unknown Love — a wildly misunderstood although highly desirable malfunction of the heart which weakens the brain, causes eyes to sparkle, cheeks to glow, blood pressure to rise and the lips to pucker.

~Author. Funny Mom Quotes FROM THE WORLD OF CARTOONS "I asked Mom if I was a gifted child. She said they certainly wouldn't have paid for me." — Calvin (Bill Watterson, Calvin and Hobbes) "Mom and Dad say I should make my life an example of the principles I .

Funny quotes about single women
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